Another snippet from my western WIP, Nobody's Bride. I'm finally reaching near the end of my first draft on this one.
This is my hero getting a gash stitched up after they've been attacked by bandits:
Liquid warmth trickled down his temple and he realized the stitches had made fresh blood well. He heard a moan from the other side of the fire and wondered at it, but didn’t have the strength to look up. He felt the sustained tug of the thread being pulled through the hole in his skin. Finally the pressure stopped, leaving him just the agony.
Hopefully Maddy had knotted her thread good and tight. He’d hate for his head to come unraveled like the toe of an old sock.
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12 comments:
haha! I love how he compares his head to an old sock. Very interesting viewpoint. Great six!
LOL, the last line made me chuckle. I also thought you did a great job describing the sensations...
OWWWW! I cringed in sympathy for him. You evoked his pain so well and I love the simile at the end. Great Six, LInda and good luck on getting that first draft done. I think you have a "keeper" with this one!
I loved how you compared his head to an old sock. Great visual. lol Made me chuckle.
Insanely vivid, then a twist of humor at the end. Perfect!
Impressive six ~ nicely done! Congrats on nearly completing the first draft:-)
Way for almost getting it done! Interesting six!
Great six! Love the last line!
Thanks for playing everybody! It was a hard scene to write. Only so many ways to say "It hurt!" See you all back next week!
Owww. Great descriptions, with all kinds of sensations -- punctuated with the great humor at the end. He's a keeper. :)
Wow Linda,
You certainly hooked me with those few lines.
Regards
Margaret
That is a great mental image.
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